Cauliflower Crust Pizza - a repost

Because I have a lot of new readers who may not be aware of the wonder that is Cauliflower Crust Pizza, I thought I’d repost it today so nobody has to miss out on the deliciousness. I originally got this recipe from The Lighter Side of Low Carb (Cleochatra does amazing things with cauliflower) and continue to enjoy it on a fairly regular basis. What’s not to like about a flourless pizza that tastes just as good as any other pizza I’ve ever had? I hope you will give it a try!

I do believe I have died and gone to low-carb heaven.

As promised, I made the pizza with the cauliflower crust that I mentioned in an earlier post. It was truly delicious. And surprisingly filling! Of course, it could very well have been all that cheese that made it so heavenly, but, whatever – it was wonderful. Had I known how easy it was to make, I’d have tried it a long time ago.

For the adventurous among you, here’s the recipe:

Cauliflower Crust Pizza

1 cup cooked, riced cauliflower

1 egg

1 cup mozzarella cheese

½ tsp fennel

1 tsp oregano

2 tsp parsley

Preheat oven to 450 degrees. Spray a cookie sheet with non-stick spray.

In a medium bowl, combine cauliflower, egg and mozzarella. Press evenly on the pan. Sprinkle evenly with spices. Bake at 450 degrees for 12-15 minutes (15-20 if you double the recipe).

Remove the pan from the oven. To the crust, add sauce, then toppings and cheese. (If you are adding meat, make sure it is cooked first.) Place under the broiler at high heat just until the cheese is melted.

And that’s it. I steamed a whole head of fresh cauliflower in a small amount of water in the microwave for 6 minutes. I should have just used frozen, but this worked out fine.

You can then use a hand grater or a food processor to rice it. I used a food processor and it was super fast. You can get one cup out of roughly half of a medium-sized head of cauliflower. I also used an Italian spice blend, rather than the three spices suggested.

I decided to go “bare bones” the first time and only topped with pizza sauce and more mozzarella. It was perfect. I cut it into four pieces and I’m not going to lie to you – I ate all four. Even though I was technically full after two. Here’s a low-carb “oink, oink” for ya.

The only advice I would give you is to check the bottom of the crust before you remove it from the oven the first time (prior to putting on the toppings). It was starting to really brown around the edges and I was afraid I was burning it, so I took it out at 12 minutes. As it turns out, I should have gone at least 15 because the bottom wasn’t browned and crispy like I think it’s supposed to be. (MJB note: I’ve learned in subsequent bakings, that it NEVER gets browned on the bottom; I don’t know where I got the idea that it was supposed to.)

I riced the remainder of the cauliflower and vacuum-sealed it so it will be ready next time. Which will probably be tomorrow.

P.S. The above picture is not mine, although mine actually came out looking almost exactly like that - I browned the cheese a lot more.

ETA: I should have mentioned that the ingredients list above is just for the crust. To finish the pizza, you will need pizza sauce and more mozzarella. Plus whatever other toppings you might want to add. If you eat meat, try diced pepperoni - delish!

Homemade noodles - and a gadget

If you’ve never attempted homemade noodles, you are really missing out. I don’t even know how to describe the taste difference, so I won’t even try. But, trust me – if you make these, you had better double the recipe because your whole family will scarf them down so fast your head will spin.

Making homemade noodles is one of those things that sound like too much work, but really isn’t. And, boy, do you ever feel all professional chef-ish when you’re rolling out that dough and cutting the noodles.

This is something I haven’t made in a long time (because of that dang white flour thing), but then I came across this Handcrafted Noodle Cutter:

Seeing this very cool gadget reminded of how much I loved the whole noodle-making process. And how much more I loved the whole noodle-eating process. Slicing the dough into something that looked even slightly uniform was always a challenge for me. This Noodle Cutter looks like it would reduce the cutting (and swearing) time significantly.

Doing a quick search of Allrecipes for homemade noodle recipes (since I cannot seem to locate mine), I found this one for Egg Noodles and this one for Basic Pasta. Be sure to read the reviews on these things because there were some great tips for making these recipes using your bread machine and your Kitchen Aid dough hook.

Homemade noodles are always great in Chicken Soup (the only soup I ever made that Mr. Jelly Belly actually ate – and, after he picked out the carrots and celery, he loved it):

You can also use them in other dishes, like this Chuck Roast with Homemade Noodles:

Homemade noodles are very versatile and CHEAP to make. I just put them on my menu for this weekend because regardless of how strange my noodles always look (because of my inadequate cutting skills), they are always delicious.

Guilt-Free Scalloped Potatoes and Onions

I love scalloped potatoes. In fact, I love them so much I don’t eat them any more. Portion control? What’s that?

So I was thrilled when I found this great recipe at Allrecipes last year for scalloped potatoes that contain no dairy products or cream-of-anything soup.

If you think all that means “no taste” you would be mistaken. Delicious and surprisingly creamy, they are made with chicken broth instead of milk or heavy cream. I made them at Easter last year and everyone loved them. Even the ever-fussy Mr. Jelly Belly, who I did not inform of the missing dairy.

Some options: If you’re vegetarian, I’m sure you could substitute vegetable broth and get the same result. One of the reviewers on Allrecipes said she used cornstarch instead of the white flour and it came out just fine – so I’ll be doing that next time. Other people said they sautéed the onions first with the butter and another person said she pureed the onions so her fussy kids wouldn’t know they were in there. Many people added additional spices (I don’t find it necessary) and apparently the mayonnaise could be considered optional.

So, without further ado, here’s the recipe:

Scalloped Potatoes and Onions

5 large potatoes, peeled and thinly sliced
3/4 cup chopped onion
3 tablespoons butter or margarine
1/4 cup all-purpose flour
1 3/4 cups chicken broth (I use fat-free)
2 tablespoons mayonnaise
3/4 teaspoon salt
1/8 teaspoon pepper
Paprika

In a greased 2-1/2-qt. baking dish, layer potatoes and onion. In a saucepan, melt the butter; stir in flour until smooth. Gradually add broth, mayonnaise, salt and pepper; cook and stir for 2 minutes or until thick and bubbly. Pour over potatoes. Sprinkle with paprika. Cover and bake at 325 degrees F for 2 hours or until tender.

I hear that these potatoes are also great leftover - but I have no way of knowing whether they are or not. :)

Italian Marinated Vegetable Salad

A while back I found this great recipe in Kraft’s Food and Family magazine for an Italian Marinated Vegetable Salad. Full of raw vegetables, it was right up my alley.

I have my version of this salad for lunch, sometimes every day for two weeks straight. I say “my version” because when I went back to look at the original recipe, I realized what I was making wasn’t very close at all to the original. But I think that might just be the beauty of this recipe – it’s easy to change up, adding ingredients you like, removing those you don’t – and it’s still delicious. Here’s the original recipe:

Italian Marinated Vegetable Salad

½ lb. green beans, whole or cut in half
2 cups cauliflower florets
1 cups halved cherry tomatoes or 1 whole tomato, chopped
1 cup canned chickpeas (garbanzo beans) drained and rinsed
1 cup sliced green olives
¼ cup thinly sliced sun-dried tomatoes
½ cup Kraft Tuscan House Italian Dressing

Add green beans and cauliflower to boiling water and cook until crisp-tender. Drain, rinse under cold water and drain again. Place in bowl. Add remaining ingredients and refrigerate for 3 hours or until chilled.


Ah, look at all that beautiful fiber. The combination of beans and raw vegetables make this a far more filling salad than most. I know the original recipe says to cook the green beans and cauliflower. I don’t do that. Mostly because I’m lazy, but also because I like raw cauliflower and I didn’t use the green beans.

The Tuscan Sunset dressing, which sounds great and all, was also something I haven’t used. But I probably will at some point, because I guess that's what makes it an Italian salad. For now, though, I make it with a mix of fat-free sour cream and a package of Hidden Valley Ranch powder. As the flavors blend, this version literally tastes better every day. I’m sure there are a lot of other dressings that will work as well.

The green olives, while high in sodium, add a really nice kick to the whole thing so there is no way I am leaving them out.

I always use broccoli, chopped into bite-sized pieces in place of the green beans and I added diced ham. I don’t know where I got the idea there was ham in a recipe FOR A VEGETABLE SALAD when I first made it, but it’s a mistake that ended up tasting pretty good!

Side note: Did you know that Kraft Food and Family Magazine is no longer free? I’ve been getting (and enjoying) this magazine for years but I see now you must subscribe for $11.98 per year. Mine is still being delivered, but I’m starting to wonder how long that is going to last. And isn’t it funny that even though I love this magazine, I don’t think I would ever pay for it? Seriously, it’s one long Kraft advertisement. Why would I?

Let them eat cake

Brandy, Not Your Average Soccer Mom and a very funny person to boot, posted a somewhat complicated but worth it recipe on her blog yesterday. Maybe she didn’t realize, but her recipe is the go-to cake recipe of Weight Watchers members everywhere. Or perhaps she did. How would I know?

Anyhoo, sometimes you just want cake, even if it’s going to be really complicated to prepare, and sometimes you want variety. And sometimes you want a variety of cakes. Where am I going with this? Oh, I can’t remember – I’m just a tad bit hungover this morning and not entirely coherent.

Yes, I know – cake is not the healthiest food choice. But it’s Valentine’s Day. And I was too busy last night working on today’s hangover to put too very much thought into today’s post. So here are some variations on Brandy’s recipe.

Cake every day. That’s what I say. (Um, ignore the rhyming. Completely unintentional.)

Diet Soda Cake

1 (12oz.) can diet soda
1 box Cake Mix, dry
2 egg whites (optional, but some people saying adding this makes the cake fluffier)

Prepare pan (spray with Pam cooking spray) and heat oven according to package directions. Mix together and bake according to package directions for size of cake pan or cupcakes.

Popular combos:
- spice cake mix w/ diet orange
- Banana cake mix w/ diet root beer
- lemon cake mix w/ diet 7-up
- Chocolate cake w/ Diet coke
- Lemon cake w/ Diet ginger ale
- orange cake w/diet Mountain Dew
- cherry chip cake w/ A& W diet Cream
- Lemon cake w/ Diet Lemon lime
- angel w/ Diet Orange
- White w/ Diet Orange
- yellow cake w/ Diet orange
- white cake w/ Diet Peach
- spice cake w/ diet lemon-lime
- White w/ diet ginger ale
- chocolate cake w/ Diet cherry coke
- devils food w/ diet vanilla coke
- chocolate cake w/ root beer
- marble cake w/ diet cream soda
- lemon with tangerine diet rite
- white cake mix w/ diet sprite
- Red Velvet w/ Diet Cherry Vanilla Dr Pepper
- Banana cake w/ diet root beer
- Pineapple cake w/ diet Squirt

(The hideous cake picture above is from Cake Wrecks. If you've never been to this blog, you should go now; it's hilarious.)

Laughing Cow Cheese: It's not just for crackers

I’m sure you are all familiar with Laughing Cow Cheese, that tasty, triangular snack food which, at 35 calories per wedge (1 point on Weight Watchers), has the diet world abuzz. It’s rare to be able to enjoy a cheese product and still feel virtuous about doing so.

Do you have any idea how many things you can actually do with this stuff? Talk about versatile! If you’ve only been spreading it on your Wasa crackers, you’ve been missing out. Try some of these ideas:

- Use it instead of mayo on a wrap or sandwich. It's great with lean ham or turkey.

- Dip baby carrots into it.

- Spread it on a Wasa cracker and top with fresh sliced mushrooms or tomatoes.

- Spread it on an English muffin and top with a Boca burger.

- Spread it on an English muffin with sugar-free strawberry jam for a faux danish.

- Use it to replace the yolk in your hardboiled egg.

- Make a tomato sandwich using the garlic herb flavor in place of mayonnaise.

- Melt it into an egg white omelet.

- Pop it right into your mouth!

- Melt a wedge on a baked potato.

- Combine it with some breadcrumbs and stuff some mushrooms.

- Mash a garlic and herb wedge and stir it into 1 tsp. of red wine vinegar and chopped scallions for a salad dressing

- Eat it with pretzels.

- Put it on a fat free hotdog, on a light bun. It’s a cheese dog!

- Spread the light swiss on an English muffin or bagel and sprinkle with sans sucre cinnamon sugar substitute.

- Saute some peppers, onions and mushrooms, add some thin sliced roast beef, heat, add wedge of cheese and melt. Put on a whole wheat bun or wrap in a tortilla and you have an AWESOME sandwich!

- I have also used the above method to make a “Reuben Wrap” by mixing thin slices of corned beef, sauerkraut and a light swiss wedge and wrapping it in a low-carb tortilla.

And here’s my favorite actual recipe using Laughing Cow. The name sounds all fancy-schmancy, doesn’t it, but it’s one of my easiest recipes – and one of the most popular with my family.


Chicken Cordon Bleu
Yield: 4 servings; 5 points per serving

4 4oz chicken breasts, pounded thin
8 pieces thinly sliced honey ham
4 wedges Laughing Cow Light Swiss Cheese
1/2 package Shake & Bake

Preheat oven to 400. Pound chicken until 1/4 inch thickness. (If you don’t have a meat mallet, just use a can of soup to do the pounding.)

Use 2 slices of ham per chicken and 1 wedge laughing cow cheese. Roll chicken and secure with toothpicks. Place in baking dish sprayed with Pam and sprinkle tops with Shake and Bake. Bake 35-45 minutes.

Tofu Talk

I am back from my blog hiatus...did you miss me?

Sometimes I think I am always the very last person on earth to get around to trying different food products. Oh, wait. That’s not quite true. The very last person would be Mr. Jelly Belly. Especially when it comes to something like tofu. If he was stranded on a deserted island, hadn’t eaten a bite for weeks and some friendly natives brought him tofu, he would turn up his nose and politely decline. I think he would rather eat bugs.

It’s not that I have anything against meat alternatives, it’s just that tofu has never been something that sounded appealing or particularly tasty. When I think of tofu, the only thing that comes to mind is that Thanksgiving episode of Everybody Loves Raymond when Marie made a tofu turkey. Seriously? Gross. And I find that kind of funny because I’m the type of person who rarely met a food she didn’t like. Still, tofu and sushi (raw fish? ewww) are the top two foods it seems everyone else eats but I have never tried.

But last week Carla over at Uno Acres (who, by the way, should get some kind of award for being the most organized person EVER) posted a recipe that used tofu to stretch out your peanut butter and save some calories. Because I often do the same thing, using fat-free cream cheese with peanut butter (which I can’t do any more because of that pesky dairy thing), I thought I might give it a try. Someday. When I worked up some nerve.

Then I bought this frozen Teriyaki Rice and Vegetable Bowl, made by Amy’s Kitchen, and it featured tofu as one of the main ingredients.



I inspected it closely and then I ate it. And guess what? It wasn’t horrible. Of course, someone else prepared it. And that can make a pretty big difference.

Since I know absolutely nothing about tofu, I looked it up and found this gag-inspiring information – which I am happy I did not read prior to finding the stuff in my rice bowl:

Known as soybean curd, tofu is a soft cheese-like food made by curdling fresh hot soymilk with a coagulant. It is a neutral-flavored product that easily absorbs the flavors of other ingredients with which it is cooked. Tofu is rich in high-quality protein and B-vitamins and is low in sodium.

Coagulation. Yummy. So far, it’s not sounding all that appetizing. Plus, I think they really need to come up with some better names for this stuff. “Tofutti” is kind of a cute name; soybean curd, not so much.

There are two types of tofu – silken (or soft) and firm (or regular). They both look like this:



Is it just me, or does tofu bear a strong resemblance to this wonder product:

There’s a reason tofu is so popular with vegetarians. Ten grams of protein per half-cup serving. (Hey! It occurs to me that is the EXACT SAME protein content as my Bear Naked granola. Which was 5 grams for ¼ cup. Interesting. ) Tofu is also high in calcium and has only 94 calories per serving.

So, all of the above whining aside, I am finding myself getting really curious about tofu. I want to make tofu-containing recipes. I want to make Mr. Jelly Belly roll his eyes when he sees what I am doing. I want him to imply my food choices are disgusting. I want to eat my tofu with gusto right in front of his red-meat-loving-face. Can you make sugar-free, dairy-free, gluten-free desserts with tofu? I’ll bet you can!

But since a girl can’t live on dessert alone (try as she might), and assuming I can even figure out where they hide the darn tofu in the grocery store, I am going to give this Breakfast Burrito recipe a try. It actually sounds good. And I’ll bet it won’t kill me. And since I know you are dying for new tofu recipes, here it is:

Vegan Breakfast Burrito

3-4 flour tortillas
3 tbsp vegetable oil
1 clove garlic, minced
1/2 onion, diced
1 pound firm or extra-firm tofu, chopped into 1-inch cubes
1/2 cup sliced mushrooms
1 large tomato, diced
1/8 tsp turmeric
dash Tabasco sauce, or to taste
salt and pepper to taste
non-dairy vegan sour cream (optional)
grated vegan cheese (optional)

Warm flour tortillas over stove or in microwave until heated and soft.

In a large skillet or frying pan, sautee the garlic and onion in vegetable oil for a minute or two, then add tofu, mushrooms and tomatoes and cook, stirring frequently for 4-6 minutes, or until mushrooms are soft.

Remove from heat. Mix in turmeric and a few dashes of Tabasco sauce. Season generously with salt and pepper.

Place a couple spoonfuls of the tofu and vegetable mixture in each flour tortilla. Top with vegan sour cream and vegan cheese if desired, then wrap and serve hot.
_____

P.S. I have absolutely no idea what turmeric is. And the name alone kind of scares me.

Confession: I am a food gawker

I must confess. I have been spending an inordinate amount of time looking at food. Not real food. Pictures of food. Have you been to the Food Gawker site? If you haven’t yet discovered this particular addiction, prepare to be enabled.

Is it wrong that I just spent a full hour of my employer’s time (Oh dear Lord – Crab Macaroni and Cheese) browsing pictures of food like some women might browse for shoes? It’s like a guilty little internet secret. Like a porn addiction – only for the food-obsessed.

I heard a comedian say once that she viewed recipes much like she viewed science fiction: She reads it all the way to the end and then says, “Yeah, like that’s ever gonna happen”. (Sweet mother of mercy – Devil’s Food Cheesecake!) That’s kind of how I feel looking at this site. I will probably never make more than one or two of the recipes. But damn! I just can’t stop looking at all the glorious, beautifully photographed food.

I’m sure the recipes aren’t all low calorie, (Oh my word! – Squash Ravioli With Sage Brown Butter) but when you’re just gawking, it’s calorie-free. And you can’t go wrong with that. But if I had someone around who would prepare any or all of these foods for me, I would JUST BE FAT - and be so freaking happy about it, you could not believe.

Should you wish to go beyond the picture and look at the actual recipe, just click on the picture and be taken to the food blog where it was originally posted. Or scroll down to the bottom of the main page (Oh my heavens – Yogurt Cake With Tart Cherries) and search by categories. So you CAN actually use this as a cooking resource. If you’re not a foodophile, deriving a twisted pleasure from gawking lasciviously at someone’s innocent food pictures.


Photo Credit: Northwest Noshings

Sweet potatoes don't have to be a PITA

I am not the kind of person who has to eat SOMETHING DIFFERENT every day. If I find something I like, I can eat it every single day and be just fine with it. Obsession? Perhaps. Well, okay, probably. Although my obsession with oatmeal eventually turned into a problem, most things don’t.

One of the things I became enamored of in the past was sweet potatoes. So close to pumpkin, what’s not to like? I ate them with my dinner every night for maybe a month straight, then I tapered off to a couple of times a week. Never got sick of it. AND, of course, it’s so good for you.

I seem to be on a “superfoods” kick, although I didn’t intend it that way. In fact, up until just this very minute I had no idea sweet potatoes were considered a superfood. Heavy on the beta-carotene, one sweet potato will provide your daily requirement of Vitamin A and one-third of your Vitamin C requirement.

If eaten with the skin on, a sweet potato has as much fiber as one cup of oatmeal (again with the oatmeal?) for about 100 calories. I personally don’t eat it with the skin on. Does anyone? A regular potato, always…a sweet potato never. It seems tough to me. Am I wrong?

Anyway, prior to the beginning of my sweet potato obsession, I always thought they were a PITA to cook. To bake them in the oven took waaaaaay too long and putting them in the microwave was okay, but I didn’t think they came out as well. Plus, a “baked” sweet potato, to me, requires lots of butter and a ton of brown sugar and cinnamon. Since that no longer fit into my dietary plan, I had to find a new way to make them that was easy to prepare and just a little less hedonistic.

So I present to you the only recipe I have ever made up on my own. Not entirely original OR fancy and probably not Thanksgiving-company-worthy, but easy to make even during the week. Microwaving first shaves about 40 minutes off of the baking time. Some peeling and chopping involved, but if you have a good potato peeler and a good knife, it just takes a minute or two. Especially if you are not concerned with neatness.

Jean’s Easy Peasy Sweet Potatoes

1 medium sweet potato, peeled and sliced
1 apple (I use Granny Smith) peeled and diced
Splenda or Splenda Brown Sugar, to taste
Cinnamon, to taste
I Can’t Believe It’s Not Butter Spray, or Pam Butter-Flavored Spray

Place potato and apple in a microwave-safe bowl with just enough water to cover. Microwave on high for about 6 or 7 minutes. Drain.

Empty potatoes and apples into a small casserole dish sprayed with Butter-flavored Pam. Sprinkle with Splenda (regular or brown sugar) and cinnamon to taste. Spray top with either ICBINB spray or Butter flavored Pam.

Cover and bake for 15-20 minutes at around 400 degrees. If you’ve got something else in the oven, that’s fine, just adjust the cooking time.

I like to claim this makes two servings but, seriously, one potato and one apple? I can eat the whole thing myself.

Oh, one more thing. It doesn’t look even slightly like the picture above. But if I was concerned with being fancy-schmancy, it would.

Be careful what you're putting on that pumpkin pie, Missy

The other day, I was having a discussion about pumpkin pie with my lovely niece Melissa (as I’ve told you…I live for the pumpkin – and Melissa is very like-minded) and, naturally, the conversation progressed to whipped toppings.

I mentioned that I prefer Reddi-Wip myself but Mr. Jelly Belly only likes Cool Whip so, of course that’s what we use. Melissa reminded me that I shouldn’t eat that “nasty stuff” because it’s loaded with trans fats and other fake, unhealthy ingredients.

I only buy fat-free Cool Whip. I buy that because I assume anything labelled "fat-free" is, indeed, free of fat. And I'm all about shaving those calories wherever I can. (Yeah, don't even suggest I give up the whipped cream entirely.)

I felt so gullible. After the big post I wrote on trans fats and the "per serving" scam and learning about what to look for in the ingredients list, I never even looked at the ingredients in Cool Whip. At first I didn’t believe her. This is FAT-FREE Cool Whip, not regular. But I had a sinking feeling.

Quickly, I googled up the ingredients, praying it wasn’t so. And what I found will keep me off of the Cool Whip forever.

Cool Whip contains hydrogenated oil, but according to the FDA (and I was confused about this) only oils that are “partially” hydrogenated contain trans fats. So, Cool Whip doesn’t contain trans fats, but what it does contain may make your hair curl.

I found a very enlightening article on Wired.Com that breaks down Cool Whip’s ingredients and calls it “a delicious blend of sugar, wax and condom lube.” Mmmmm…condom lube.

If you have been avoiding Cool Whip because of the trans fats, I guess this means you are free to enjoy it again. If you can enjoy it after you read this description of its ingredients. Yuck.

Here’s the Wired article in its entirety, or you can find the original post here. Any added emphasis is mine.


A delicious blend of sugar, wax, and condom lube.
Source: Wired.com

Water

It's the main ingredient. But like any whipped product, Cool Whip contains a high percentage of air. At 41 cents per ounce, you're buying mostly water and air for just over twice what it would cost to whip real cream yourself.

Natural and Artificial Flavorings

Cool Whip doesn't really taste like much, but Kraft's recipe for blandness is a trade secret. That means the company doesn't have to disclose the specific flavorings.

Corn Syrup and High-Fructose Corn Syrup

Sugar by other names. Corn syrup is mostly glucose. High-fructose corn syrup is corn syrup treated with amylase and other enzymes, which together help convert glucose into fructose. A diet high in fructose is known to make lab mice fatter than other diets, so keep your research animals away from Cool Whip.

Hydrogenated Coconut and Palm Kernel Oil

Cool Whip needs to feel like whipped cream in the mouth without actually being, you know, made with cream. One cheap, reliable way to replicate the texture is by using semi- solidified plant oils. The best method of solidifying plant oils: Bubble high- pressure hydrogen through them. Of course, if not done completely, the result is trans fat. These days, Kraft avoids that.

Polysorbate 60

Polysorbates are made by polymerizing ethylene oxide (a precursor to antifreeze) with a sugar alcohol derivative. The result can be a detergent, an emulsifier, or, in the case of polysorbate 60, a major ingredient in some sexual lubricants.

Sodium Caseinate

Also common in powdered non-dairy creamer, this protein derived from cow milk helps oil and water mix.

Sorbitan Monostearate

Chemists call this stuff synthetic wax, and it's sometimes used as a hemorrhoid cream. It's one of the magical substances that keep Cool Whip from turning to liquid over time in the fridge.

Xanthan and Guar Gums

These are natural thickeners, and together they provide more viscosity than either does alone. Guar also helps retard the formation of ice crystals, another key to preserving fluffiness.


Doesn't that all sound yummy? Melissa tells me Whole Foods carries a perfectly delicious version of Cool Whip. And I'll bet it doesn't have one ingredient in it that would ever be used in the manufacture of hemorrhoid creams.

You know, I own a wire whisk or three - and an electric hand mixer. Perhaps I'll start whipping my own cream. It has just GOT to be easier than this.

Whipped Cream

1 cup heavy cream

1 tsp vanilla extract

1 TBS confectioner's sugar

In a large bowl, whip cream until stiff peaks are just about to form. Beat in vanilla and sugar until peaks form. Make sure not to overbeat, or cream will become lumpy and butter-like.

But broccoli's good, right?

Most of you hated the brussel sprouts, but loved the fish and then proved to me that brown rice was indeed as dull as it sounds. But I know you like broccoli. I know you do.

Always at the top of the list of “superfoods” broccoli is high in Vitamins C and K and is known for its cancer-fighting properties. Just loaded with those wonderful antioxidants. And calcium! Did you know that? Not as much calcium as having a glass of milk, but if you can’t or won’t do dairy, it’s a good substitution. But not with Nestle’s Quik, I don’t think.

One day while searching Allrecipes, looking for a salad that I could take to a family barbecue, I came across a recipe for Bodacious Broccoli Salad. When I first saw the recipe, and after giggling about the name, I was intrigued by the ingredients. Once I was able to stop drooling over ingredients list, I realized it was also an easy recipe to make. Perfect.

This is an excellent side dish for potlucks and it is, indeed, bodacious. It is also pretty high in calories (288 per serving) but I’m going to post the recipe anyway, in case you don’t concern yourself with such things. Then I’m going to follow it up with a wonderful alternative recipe for Chilled Broccoli Salad from GreenLiteBites (a great food blog) that shaves the calories in half.

Bodacious Broccoli Salad
Makes 12 servings

8 slices bacon
2 heads fresh broccoli, chopped
1-1/2 cups sharp cheddar cheese, shredded
½ large red onion, chopped
¼ cup red wine vinegar (I've also used regular white or apple cider vinegar instead)
1/8 cup white sugar
2 tsp ground black pepper
1 tsp salt
2/3 cup mayonnaise
1 tsp fresh lemon juice

Place bacon in a large, deep skillet. Cook over medium high heat until evenly browned. Drain, and crumble. (Ha! Are they kidding here? I always use the precooked real bacon pieces from Hormel. Huge time and mess saver.)

In a large bowl, combine broccoli, cheese, bacon and onion.

Prepare the dressing in a small bowl by whisking together the red wine vinegar, sugar, pepper, salt, mayonnaise and lemon juice. Combine dressing with salad. Cover and refrigerate until ready to serve.

I prefer to make this recipe using half broccoli and half cauliflower – because you know how I love cauliflower. So try that, too. It’s even more bodaciouser. And if you happen to have some craisins around, throwing a handful or so into the mix is definitely not a bad thing.

I have been considering finding a commercially prepared dressing to use for this – because I’m nothing if not lazy. Any suggestions for that? Because I’m kind of at a loss.

And now here’s the lighter version:

Chilled Broccoli Salad
Recipe Source: GreenLiteBites

3 cups raw broccoli florets
½ cup of carrots grated/shredded
¼ cup diced sweet or red onion
2 tbsp real bacon bits
1 oz fancy shredded cheddar cheese or a Mexican cheese blend
½ cup non-fat unflavored yogurt
2 tbsp red wine vinegar
1 tbsp apple cider vinegar
1/2-1 tsp powdered Stevia extract, or to taste

If you like, blanch the broccoli. Bring a pot of water to a boil, drop in the broccoli then remove after a minute and place in a large bowl of ice cold water.

Place the broccoli, carrots, onion, bacon bits, and cheese in to a medium-large bowl.

In a smaller bowl whisk the yogurt, vinegars and stevia to make the dressing.

Pour the dressing over the broccoli mixture. Stir to coat and refrigerate for a at least 10 minutes. Serve!

So there you go. Two recipes for the price of one. If you’ve been chosen as the designated salad maker for Thanksgiving this year, this would be a nice choice. A little different from the usual fare – and much tastier. You will not be bringing home leftovers.

PS: I also came across an idea for “Loaded Broccoli” – which is like a loaded baked potato, only with broccoli instead of the potato. Top with sour cream, cheese and bacon. (Drooling again.)

Brown Rice - it's not as dull as it sounds

I think it’s a pretty well-known fact that whole grains are better for us than grains that have been refined.

[Warning: Oversimplified non-scientific facts to follow…] When you eat whole grains (complex carbohydrates), which have the outer layer of bran and fiber intact, the body’s absorption rate of sugar is slowed down, keeping you feeling full longer and stopping your blood sugar from spiking up and down. And we all know what happens when our blood sugar starts jumping around. We eat. Usually more carbs. Which starts the whole process over again.

A perfect example of this is brown rice. White rice is a stripped down version of brown rice – stripped of the bran and fiber that once composed the outer layer.

With the outer layer removed, the newly-white rice is fluffier than its whole-grain counterpart. Which is why many people think they don’t like brown rice. Not fluffy enough. Oh, and also because it takes longer to cook than Minute Rice.

If speed is the issue, you can now buy Success Boil-in-Bag Rice in the brown rice version. It cooks in about ten minutes.

And I must admit, when I’m really in a hurry (i.e., Monday through Friday), I don’t see any reason at all not to use Uncle Ben’s Ready Rice which microwaves in 90 seconds. Ninety seconds. Really.

But a lot of times, on the weekends of course, I like to make a version of brown rice that you can actually bake in the oven. It meets all of my criteria for easy cooking: Dump everything in a baking dish, cover with foil, throw it in the oven and ignore it for an hour or so. Plus it tastes great. Fluffy even.

This recipe originally came from Cook’s Illustrated Magazine and it comes out perfect every time. For a little more flavor, you can substitute chicken, beef, or vegetable broth for the water.

Foolproof Oven-Baked Brown Rice

1-1/2 cups long-, medium- or short-grain brown rice
2-1/3 cups water
2 teaspoons butter or olive oil
1/2 teaspoon salt

Preheat the oven to 375 F and move a rack to the middle position. Spread the rice into an 8-inch square, glass baking dish.

In a covered saucepan on the stove, bring the water and butter or oil to a boil over high heat. Once it begins to boil, stir in the salt and pour over the rice. Cover the baking dish tightly with a double layer of foil. Bake for one hour, until tender.

Remove from the oven and uncover. Fluff the rice with a fork, cover with a clean kitchen towel; let rice stand 5 minutes. Uncover for another 5 minutes, then serve immediately. Serves 4 to 6.

As always, you will find lots of recipes using brown rice on my wiki. Enjoy!

So how do you feel about fish?

I am praying that fish is a little higher on the list of foods you enjoy than brussel sprouts.

I wanted to talk about fish this week because it is one of those foods that I thought I didn’t really care for and now I can’t get enough of it.

For the first thirty years of my life the only seafood I ate came in a cardboard box, courtesy of Mrs. Paul. Loved those fish sticks. Smothered in tartar sauce.

As a kid, we never had “real” fish for dinner so I was never exposed to it. And then, when I was around 30, someone talked me into trying some fish at a restaurant. I couldn’t believe how fantastic it was. And, can you believe it? It wasn’t even breaded and deep fried. And not a drop of tartar sauce to be found.

Thus began my love affair with seafood. Of all kinds. I became more willing to try new things, but still I was afraid to cook it myself. You know how when you’ve never personally seen something prepared, you’re afraid to try it because you’re not exactly sure what it’s supposed to look like when it’s done? Or, for that matter, how to tell if it IS done? That’s how I was. Immobilized with fish fear.

When I joined Weight Watchers, I began to see a lot of recipes for fish. That makes sense – it’s a low-calorie, low-carb, high protein food that’s loaded with omega 3’s. And we all know how important those are, right?

At about that time I was getting just a little sick of chicken, so I began to look closely at the recipes and found that some of them just didn’t look all that difficult. Of course, I know now that NONE of them are difficult. I can’t believe I put it off for so long.

So today I want to share with you a hugely popular recipe for Broiled Tilapia Parmesan. It’s popular for a good reason – it’s fantastic! This is the first fish recipe I ever made and it remains my favorite. You really can’t mess it up. You can easily substitute any other whitefish (I’ve used orange roughy, haddock, and cod) and the results are just as good.

Broiled Tilapia Parmesan

1/2 cup Parmesan cheese
1/4 cup butter, softened
3 tablespoons mayonnaise (reduced fat or fat-free work fine)
2 tablespoons fresh lemon juice
1/4 teaspoon dried basil
1/4 teaspoon ground black pepper
1/8 teaspoon onion powder
1/8 teaspoon celery salt
2 pounds tilapia fillets

Preheat your oven's broiler. Grease a broiling pan or line pan with aluminum foil.

In a small bowl, mix together the Parmesan cheese, butter, mayonnaise and lemon juice. Season with dried basil, pepper, onion powder and celery salt. Mix well and set aside.

Arrange fillets in a single layer on the prepared pan. Broil a few inches from the heat for 2 to 3 minutes. Flip the fillets over and broil for a couple more minutes. Remove the fillets from the oven and cover them with the Parmesan cheese mixture on the top side. Broil for 2 more minutes or until the topping is browned and fish flakes easily with a fork. Be careful not to over cook the fish.

Makes 8 servings.

Nutritional information per serving: Calories 231; Total Fat 13.3 grams; Fiber .1 grams; Total Carbs .8 grams; Cholesterol 65 mg; Protein 26.1 grams

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So do you have a favorite fish recipe? If so, I’d love to hear about it.

Brussel sprouts are da bomb

Both my mother and my stepmother were rather uninspired cooks. I can never remember eating a vegetable that didn’t come from a can. Even then, the rotation was corn, peas and green beans. Strictly dullsville.

Still, my sisters and I all grew up to love vegetables. Can’t get enough of them. And I enjoy finding new ways to prepare them. Ironically, I spawned a family full of vegetable haters who would prefer that I just open a can of corn, peas or green beans and be done with it. Ah, the strange cycle of life, right?

So, anyway, on to the brussel sprouts. I have always loved those little cabbage balls. Even when I was a young cook, boiling the heck out of them until I assumed they were done, I still enjoyed them – loaded with butter and salt, natch.

Like most vegetables, brussel sprouts are low in calories (25 per half cup serving) and naturally fat-free. They are also high in vitamin C (a cancer-fighting agent), vitamin A, calcium and potassium - and here’s something I didn’t know – relatively high in protein. Protein accounts for 25% of its calories. But the protein in brussel sprouts is an incomplete protein, which means it needs to be paired with a whole grain to make it complete.

Brussel sprouts are in season right now and should be easy to find. Here is what you are looking for: Tight, compact firm heads with very few wilted or yellow leaves. The brussel sprouts should be very green in color. Or you can just head over to the freezer section and grab a bag. Either way.

Remember when we talked about roasting cauliflower? Well the recipe I am going to share here is very similar to that. Well, actually, it’s exactly the same. You just can’t go wrong with roasted vegetables. Roasted brussel sprouts get nice and brown and deliciously caramelized. They’re like candy to me. But without the chocolate.

So without further ado, here is the recipe from the Barefoot Contessa:

Roasted Brussel Sprouts

1-1/2 pounds Brussels sprouts
3 tablespoons good olive oil
3/4 teaspoon kosher salt
1/2 teaspoon freshly ground black pepper

Preheat oven to 400 degrees F.

Cut off the brown ends of the Brussels sprouts and pull off any yellow outer leaves. Mix them in a bowl with the olive oil, salt and pepper. Pour them on a sheet pan and roast for 35 to 40 minutes, until crisp on the outside and tender on the inside. Shake the pan from time to time to brown the sprouts evenly. Sprinkle with more kosher salt and serve immediately.
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So there you have it. Pretty easy, right? If you’re going to use frozen brussel sprouts for this recipe, either defrost them in the refrigerator overnight or stick them in the microwave for a minute or two.

You can plop them, whole, on the baking sheet or cut them in half first. Your choice.

I love these really browned. The browner they get, the more flavorful they become. Oh, and if you don’t have Kosher salt, get some. So much tastier than regular table salt. It comes in a huge box that you will never finish in your entire life and it’s pretty cheap.

I was also planning to mention how you can get the same browned brussel sprout effect in a frying pan, but then I found this recipe for Golden Crusted Brussel Sprouts from 101 Cookbooks, where it is explained in much more detail than I was planning to do. And adding cheese wasn’t something that even occurred to me. Be sure to scan through the comments for more ideas.

Once you’ve mastered those simple recipes and are craving even more brussel sprouts, you might feel ready to get a little fancier (think Thanksgiving side dish). Try this recipe from Tyler Florence. Bacon and brussel sprouts are a great combination – and the walnuts will add some Omega 3’s to your dinner.

Roasted Brussel Sprouts with Bacon

2 (10-ounce) packages Brussels sprouts
2 ounce piece slab bacon cut into 3/4 inch cubes
1/2 cup walnut pieces
1/2 teaspoon salt
Freshly ground black pepper

Preheat oven to 375 degrees F.

Wash and then peel off any loose or damaged leaves from the sprouts. Trim the root end and cut each sprout in half.

Cook the bacon and walnuts in a large oven-proof skillet over medium heat until bacon just begins to crisp and walnuts are toasted, about 4 minutes. Transfer the bacon and walnuts with a slotted spoon to a bowl and set aside. Add the Brussels sprouts to the skillet and season with salt and pepper.

Roast for about 30 minutes, add the bacon and walnuts and continue to roast until the sprouts are cooked through and golden, about 10 to 15 minutes more.

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So that's it. I hope this gets you past your boiled brussel sprout memories and adds a new vegetable to your dinner table. Are you willing to give it a try? If you do, let me know what you think.

Because your meals shouldn't make you gag

I have never been a fussy eater. As a kid, I would eat whatever was put in front of me and usually like it. I was not permitted to NOT like it. In fact, I can only remember not liking two things – milk in the morning and runny scrambled eggs.

My stepmother made the worst scrambled eggs. Her and my father both claimed to like the eggs kind of wet. I swear to you, they would barely be set in the pan and then they were slopped onto our plates. All four of us kids hated them. And they were always accompanied by a (mercifully small) glass of milk. It was the double whammy for me. I am gagging just thinking about it.

I brazenly asked once if my eggs could be left in the pan longer until they were more done – and even volunteered to finish the cooking myself. I was turned down flat.

And we had to eat them. We could not be excused from the table until we cleaned our plates. I could get about half of them down by filling my mouth with toast before I put a bite of the eggs in, but the toast never lasted as long as the eggs. Probably because my brother and sisters employed the same method.

I finally figured out a way to clean my plate without having to actually eat those disgusting eggs. When I was the last stubborn person left at the breakfast table and my stepmother had her back turned, cleaning up the dishes, I would shove handfuls of the nasty eggs into the pockets of my jeans. Plate thus cleaned, I could be excused – straight to the bathroom to turn out my pockets and dump the eggs into the toilet.

There is a reason why I told you that awful egg story. I believe that just about any food can be made more palatable, even to a person who claims to not like it. If my stepmother had only thrown a couple of slices of American cheese into those eggs and cooked them just five minutes longer, we all would have enjoyed the hell out of them. And the pockets of my jeans would have remained nice and dry.

Secondly, and I’m guilty of this, I think many people don’t try new things because they don’t have a clue how to go about making it – or they think it’s too complicated so they revert to the old standbys.

Beginning tomorrow, and continuing once a week or so – and until I run out of things to talk about - I will feature a new food item and include a simple recipe.

Now, I am no food blogger, so don’t be expecting gourmet recipes with lots of pictures, because that just isn’t going to happen. I think you know me better than that. But what I will do is to focus on healthier food choices (and I’ll tell you why it’s a healthy choice) and I will select recipes that even an inexperienced, or disinterested, cook can easily prepare.

Hopefully we can all expand our eating horizons in a way that our families will enjoy and we won’t hate doing.

So what do you think? Good idea? Bad idea? Suggestions? Feedback is always appreciated.

Couscous: Try it, you'll like it

If you’re one of the seven people in this country who pay attention to the government’s food pyramid, you know they advocate eating at least 3 ounces of whole grains per day. Besides being good for you, they’re just really delicious.

Prior to joining Weight Watchers, I never really paid any attention to whole grains. We always ate white rice or white pasta. Period. Then I got turned on to couscous. How did I ever live without this fabulous little food item?

Couscous is actually a form of pasta, but you can find it with the rice in the grocery store. It looks like tiny pellets when it’s dry and it cooks in about five minutes. It can be eaten either hot or cold and in both savory or sweet applications. It’s a perfect food, really. And just because Mr. Jelly Belly won’t eat it, doesn’t mean YOU won’t enjoy it.

I normally use it as a replacement for rice and, because it can be a little bland by itself, I cook it in chicken broth instead of water. I also love it cold, mixed with vanilla yogurt and strawberries (but not cooked in chicken broth). It’s fantastic and filling.

Just so you know I’m not lying about how easy it is to prepare, here are the basic cooking directions:

Use equal parts water and couscous. Bring water to a boil in saucepan. Add couscous and stir. Cover and remove from heat. Let stand five minutes. Fluff with fork.

See? Easy.

I have a lot of couscous recipes on my Wiki as well as a ton of ideas for “non-recipe” uses. Be sure to check them out. I really do think you’ll love it.

Several slices of heaven

I do believe I have died and gone to low-carb heaven.

As promised, I made the pizza with the cauliflower crust that I mentioned in an earlier post. It was truly delicious. And surprisingly filling! Of course, it could very well have been all that cheese that made it so heavenly, but, whatever – it was wonderful. Had I known how easy it was to make, I’d have tried it a long time ago.

For the adventurous among you, here’s the recipe:


Cauliflower Crust Pizza

1 cup cooked, riced cauliflower
1 egg
1 cup mozzarella cheese
½ tsp fennel
1 tsp oregano
2 tsp parsley

Preheat oven to 450 degrees. Spray a cookie sheet with non-stick spray.

In a medium bowl, combine cauliflower, egg and mozzarella. Press evenly on the pan. Sprinkle evenly with spices.

Bake at 450 degrees for 12-15 minutes (15-20 if you double the recipe).

Remove the pan from the oven. To the crust, add sauce, then toppings and cheese. (If you are adding meat, make sure it is cooked first.)

Place under the broiler at high heat just until the cheese is melted.

And that’s it. I steamed a whole head of fresh cauliflower in a small amount of water in the microwave for 6 minutes. I should have just used frozen, but this worked out fine.

You can then use a hand grater or a food processor to rice it. I used my mini food processor that came with my Cuisinart Stick Blender and it was super fast. You can get one cup out of roughly half of a medium-sized head. I also used an Italian spice blend, rather than the three spices suggested.

I decided to go “bare bones” the first time and only topped with pizza sauce and more mozzarella. It was perfect. I cut it into four pieces and I’m not going to lie to you – I ate all four. Even though I was technically full after two. Here’s a low-carb “oink, oink” for ya.

The only advice I would give you is to check the bottom of the crust before you remove it from the oven the first time (prior to putting on the toppings). It was starting to really brown around the edges and I was afraid I was burning it, so I took it out at 12 minutes. As it turns out, I should have gone at least 15 because the bottom wasn’t browned and crispy like I think it’s supposed to be.

I riced the remainder of the cauliflower and vacuum-sealed it so it will be ready next time. Which will probably be tomorrow.

P.S. Mine actually came out looking almost exactly like the picture - I browned the cheese a lot more.

A fat-free vegetable dip you can live with

If you don’t like to eat your raw vegetables plain – and, really, who does? – try this simple dip:

Mix together one package of Hidden Valley Ranch dry mix (look for the fat-free version) with 16 ounces of fat-free sour cream. Refrigerate for several hours or overnight to allow the flavors to blend together.

I like to put two tablespoons worth in a little plastic container (for portion control) and take it with me to work. It makes a great afternoon snack.

It’s really surprisingly good. Hide it from your family. They will eat it all.

Look what's poppin'...

When presented with a vegetable tray at parties, I always go for the cauliflower first. Everyone knows a raw piece of cauliflower is delicious with ranch dip. But doing the healthy thing and steaming it does absolutely nothing for me. And then I found out it doesn’t have to be blah when you cook it.

Since I’ve given up excessive oatmeal, I had to find another food item to be obsessed about. It’s just how I am. For the time being, cauliflower is it. Now don’t be goin’ all Mr. Jelly Belly on me and turning up your nose…it’s really good stuff!

In my opinion, the best way is to cook it is to roast it with olive oil; however, since my oven hasn’t been cleaned since, well ever, actually, putting really hot oil in it tends to set off the smoke detector. If my poor puppy gets even the slightest whiff of hot oil, he starts whimpering and pawing at the door, desperately trying to get away from that ear-splitting sound. Did I mention it’s a self-cleaning oven? But I digress…

Food snobs will tell you that the only way to eat vegetables is fresh and while I agree, to a point, I find myself using frozen more and more. Frozen vegetables have a much longer shelf life, plus someone else has already done all the cleaning and cutting for me. So it’s your choice – fresh or frozen; the end result is exactly the same.

For you perverse people with sparkling clean ovens, take the whole head and break it up into small pieces (or use frozen – you can defrost first in the microwave if you want, but it’s not necessary). Toss with olive oil (or spritz with this fantastic Misto Olive Oil sprayer) and kosher salt then roast it at 425 degrees for an hour, stirring a few times. When it’s nice and brown – and the browner the better – and the pieces are a bit crunchy, its done.

You’ll notice the above directions said to roast for an hour. As you know, I am far too lazy (and impatient) to keep watch over a bunch of cauliflower for an entire hour. So I now do it on the stove top and it’s much faster. Heat olive oil and garlic (optional) in a large frying pan. Add the cauliflower, season as desired (I like seasoned sea salt) and toss to coat. Cook over a high heat until all the pieces are browned. This probably takes, at the most, 25 minutes. When it’s done, you can sprinkle with some parmesan if you like, but it doesn’t need it.

The good thing about this is it’s not only good as a side dish at dinner, it also makes a great snack. Who knew?

Next up: I have a really interesting recipe that uses cauliflower as the crust for pizza. I’ll bet you can hardly wait.

Badass Mother Cluckers

I came across this great article from Women's Health Magazine on 50 easy ways to cook a 4-ounce chicken breast.

For your weekend grilling pleasure, here are some recipes for your grill. To see the complete list you can either click on the title of this post to go to the original article, or visit my Wiki.

THE BASICS Soak the chicken in these marinades for at least an hour. Heat a grill or place a nonstick skillet over medium-high heat on the stove. Cook for three to five minutes per side.

Booze Infused 2 Tbsp bourbon, 1 tsp deli-style mustard, 1/4 tsp black pepper

Sweet Booze Infused 2 Tbsp bourbon; 1 tsp honey; 1 clove garlic, crushed

Red Wine Dressed 2 Tbsp red wine; 1 tsp barbecue sauce; 1 clove garlic, crushed

White Wine Dressed 2 Tbsp white wine; 1 clove garlic, crushed; 1/4 tsp thyme

Rich & Creamy 2 Tbsp plain yogurt, 1/4 tsp dill

Curry Cream 2 Tbsp plain yogurt, 1 tsp olive oil, 1/4 tsp curry powder

Margaritaville 2 Tbsp lime juice, 1 tsp olive oil, 1/4 tsp cilantro

Cumin & Lime 2 Tbsp lime juice, 1/4 tsp cumin, 1/4 tsp red pepper flakes

Lemon Zest 2 Tbsp lemon juice, 1/4 tsp lemon zest, 1/4 tsp black pepper

Balsamic Herb 2 Tbsp vinaigrette, 1/4 tsp rosemary

Ginger Spiced 2 Tbsp orange juice, 1/4 tsp powdered ginger, 1/4 tsp cilantro

O-juiced 2 Tbsp orange juice, 1 Tbsp hoisin sauce, 1/4 tsp red pepper flakes

Soda Popped 2 Tbsp cola, 1/4 tsp black pepper

Red Pepper Pop 1 Tbsp reduced-sodium soy sauce, 1 tsp sesame oil, 1/4 tsp red pepper flakes

Hawaiian Punch 2 Tbsp pineapple juice; 1 clove garlic, crushed; 1/4 tsp black pepper

TIP Mix the marinade ingredients well in a resealable plastic bag, drop in the chicken, seal, shake, and refrigerate.